17th August 2014
In the spirit of letting go, here are a few photos from the recording studio:
(taken with my telephone)


The release date is near...
...and I am not
sure, how I feel about this.
Only recently I mentioned to an acquaintance of mine, how very important it has been for me to have the finished album all to
for the last few months. Admittedly, this is no news, but this time I needed it even than more I usual do.
When he asked me what the album sounds like, I couldn't give him an answer though. It wasn't that I didn't want to talk about it ... I just ... didn't know what to say. This may seem rather odd, if not downright stupid, coming from the person who created it ... but, the thing is ... I was completely lacking distance ... and even now, when I think of
, all the ... well,
... are crashing down on me in one giant wave.
My initial reaction was to describe it as
... but then I thought of the occasional eruption here and there, and suddenly I wasn't so sure anymore. I also tend to
the music like pictures in my head, rather than just hear it, which doesn't make it easier to describe it in three words or less.
In an attempt to help, he then asked, if it sounded anything like the previous album
, but even that I couldn't answer for certain. I had never compared the two. But now that I have listened to both albums in a row (several times actually), I can at least say that they work very well together ... - which is good. After all, they
The peculiar thing about
is that ... unlike all the albums before ... it wasn't done in one ... umm,  "block".  As in the mixing didn't follow right after the recording. In fact, now that I think about it, there wasn't even enough time to complete the vocals in one go, which did worry me immensely.
You have to keep in mind that recording an album is a magic(k)al process (well, at least it is in
The most intensive moment (for lack of a better word) is the time when the vocals are being recorded, and, more or less immediately after that, the song is being mixed. The concentration of energies that have been called/invoked during the conception of the album is at its highest then ... which is why it is so important to channel them right there ... and, by mixing the song, direct them to where you want/need the energies to go. Once the entire album is finished, you can exhale ...
... and release the energies. In the course of the following year(s) they work their magic ...  which means that things happen to you ... all in accordance with the vibration, subject, intention and/or theme of the album.
This is how it has always been. This is what I am used to, as this is how I work.
But not so this time.

After the music had been recorded, I couldn't go back to the studio to complete the vocals and mix the album. I can't quite remember why, but I think the studio was booked up or something. Anyway, the result was that I had to wait for almost
half a year
to go back and finish everything. An eternity!
This had never happened before. What was I suppose to do? I mean, there I was with all the energies literally circling around me, spinning faster and faster ... and I had no way to release them and find closure.
At first I thought I was about to go insane ... but then I began to worry that the energies would simply dissolve after a while, fading away without having been directed into the proper channels. In other words, I was afraid that they would just disappear, and that everything I had worked for would have been for nothing. In fact,
was a lot more frightening than the thought of going insane.
But then something happened that I had not expected at all (and which I only realised in retrospect): the energies began to
. They kept circling around me, but not in a violent way ... and, not having received their final "order" (again, for lack of a better word), they began to search for a "solution" on their own. Well, in a manner of speaking.
I know, all this probably sounds crazy to an ordinary person, but I don't know how else to explain it without giving away too much information.
When I was recording the album, I was under a lot of pressure, partially also, because I was worried (probably for the first time in a while) that I would not be able to channel the energies properly, and that, because of a my inability, the result would be disastrous ... so that, instead of healing myself, the exact opposite might happen to me.
But in the months that followed the recording, I witnessed the magic(k) unfold (almost all by itself) ... and when I eventually returned to the studio for the final part, I was ... well, maybe not exactly relaxed, but a lot more confident that all was going to turn out well in the end.
And, luckily, it
.  :)
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
So, now that the official release date is finally approaching, I once again have to prepare myself to let an album go. Admittedly, it's a strange (and slightly unsettling) thought to know that it will be "out there" (perhaps even more so than it usually is) ... but ...
oh, well
... it has to be done.
is essentially an album about
... and, as a consequence, the need for
. It begins where
has left off ... that is, in the realm of dreams and all things
. Then, through childhood memories and a descent into the vault, it enters the
ordinary world
(aka the land of the living), and eventually concludes in an open end.
Here is a short
extract from the song
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

3La Prima Vez
5The Boy has built a Catacomb   
6Carnival of Souls
8Under his Light
9You cannot make him love you
10Into the Night
11If you could only read my Mind
12It's just that my Sadness
13Under his Light (2)
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